Trembling Madness
by mybutterfly
Summary: He kissed me again. Now, if a person kisses you twice, it can't be a mistake, right?
1. Chapter 1

**Trembling Madness**

"Will I ever love again? Am I going to be happy? Should I have sex with Sai one more time or just let it go? What should I do? Ino help me!"

I cried a little as Ino grabbed me from my shoulders and shook me until I stopped sobbing. She looked into my eyes and whispered softly

"Sakura, do whatever you feel like doing. Don't throw yourself to Sai if you don't really want to. It could be worse actually; maybe he's using you only for sex. Revenge sex is not the answer and you know that."

I sighed quietly and nodded. Sure, I knew that, but I needed to do something about my disturbing thoughts. I couldn't lie in my bed and think about all the girls that were currently swooning for Sasuke trying desperately to catch his attention. This situation was not working for me.

"But that's exactly why I want to sleep with Sai again. He's the best I ever had! He knows exactly what I like and what I don't like. We're friends so no strings attached. Its perfect!"

I grinned but it slowly disappeared. Ino was right; I shouldn't have sex with Sai or anyone for that matter. I should just wait for someone nice to come along and sweep me off my feet. I was too old to have a friend with benefits anyway. I sighed again, clearly not happy. Sasuke was currently in a mission fooling around with who knows who and I was here in Konoha, lonely and in a bar having a girl's night out with Ino.

Raising my glass, I started to think about my life and my relationship with Sasuke. How had my life become so complicated and unfulfilling?

_Cheers_.

xxxxx

I think it was a few months ago when I first saw him. We were already at the bar having a few drinks with Naruto, Hinata, Ino and Sai. We were all laughing when suddenly Shikamaru came in with a guy next to him. He had the most beautiful eyes I had ever seen. They were dark and full of mystery. You could totally get lost in them and guess what? _I did_. We looked at each other for what it seemed a very long time. Finally, I broke contact and looked to my right. I winked at Ino and mouthed "He's hot". We giggled and asked him a few questions to get to know him better. After all, he was Shikamaru's friend. Soon enough Sasuke became best friends with Naruto and I, being best friends with Naruto, hanged out with them. I thought he was great. I really did. He never spoke much but he listened all the time to Naruto's ranting about ramen or how he wanted to be the best ninja ever. We trained together and had so much fun. _Team Seven_. A lot of memories came to mind...

xxxxx

I don't understand why he avoids me, even after we kissed a few days ago. It was such a good party but maybe it went too far. He kissed me out of the blue and me, being so attracted to Sasuke, did an internal happy dance instead of pushing him away. We're friends so what is he doing?

Wait a second, what does this mean? He has never done that… maybe he likes me? Maybe it was a mistake from his part but then again Sasuke never makes mistakes. I don't understand. Maybe he's ashamed of the kiss and sudden closeness or maybe he's ashamed of me. Maybe is because of my huge forehead. Is my forehead that big that it's so repulsive? So many questions I don't have the answers to. My head is spinning wild so maybe I should just let it go and dropped it.

But,

He kissed me again. Now, if a person kisses you twice, it can't be a mistake right?

Wait a minute,

Third time is the charm.


	2. Chapter 2

**Trembling Madness**

I think I haven't experienced a kiss so sweet in my life. The anticipation of it was unlike any other I have ever felt. The feeling in my stomach when Sasuke asked me if I had kissed anyone else after breaking up with Gaara was overwhelming. He leaned in, his face was nearing mine and all I did was stare at his black eyes. It was our second kiss and I loved it. _Such a sweet sensation_. It was only us, walking home after a party at Ino's. He deepened the kiss after a while and I smiled to myself. He was being so sweet and charming_. Like a fairytale_.

Suddenly, Naruto came running towards us beaming and unaware that anything was happening between Sasuke and I. Sasuke pushed me back a little bit and he stepped back a few steps as well. He didn't want to be caught kissing me. My heart dropped. _Hard._

"Teme! You walked out so fast I had to run all the way here to catch you!"

Naruto was smiling. He knew nothing.

"Dobe"

I couldn't stop looking at Sasuke. He was so cold again. Is he ashamed of me? My heart went numb as I finally understood what was going on. I wasn't pretty enough for him. He'll probably choose to die twice instead of being seen kissing me.

_He can burn in hell._

xxxxx

I avoided him for like a week. If we saw each other, I ignored him and acted as if he wasn't there. I talked to him just barely but only if it was necessary. I don't think he noticed I was being distant and if he did, he didn't say anything. Things were normal in a matter of days, as if nothing ever happened between us. Such a shame, it really was a waste of my energy. I got my hopes up only to end up with nothing in return. My mind was saying Sasuke is an idiot but my body was acting on his own. I felt so attracted to him that it was ridiculous. I couldn't wait to kiss him again but I knew it wasn't going to happen any time soon.

xxxxx

"I actually think that he's crazy Ino"

"Why? What happened? Did he kiss you again?" She was smiling.

Saying that Ino was beaming wasn't enough. She was very happy ever since she became Shikamaru's girlfriend. They had been dating for a while so it wasn't a big surprise for anyone. I was happy for them but I couldn't help but wondered where was my prince charming. Of course he was most likely training, being chased by girls or ignoring me. Sigh. I wonder if Sasuke is really my prince charming. I guess only time will tell.

"Not only he kissed me a week ago but he looked so embarrassed to do so! I hate him. He thinks he's so great when he's not. I mean he's hot and everything but that doesn't mean he should feel ashamed of me and then treat me like shit afterwards. I hate him, I hate him, I hate him!"

"Sakura relax, he's just being immature. If he kissed you then he likes you. Believe me."

I raised my eyebrow. Suddenly she was a love doctor? What the fuck was I supposed to do now?

"I have an idea"

Ino stood up really quickly and pull me out of my chair.

"What are you doing?" I asked. This was weird.

"We should celebrate that we're both going to be in relationships. This is so great! We can arrange double dates to the beach, the cinema, parties…"

I stopped listening to her after that. She was so sure Sasuke liked me that she actually thought we were going to end up together, as in, a real relationship.

Pfff…

_Very unlikely._


	3. Chapter 3

**Trembling Madness**

"Hey! Sakura-chan!"

Naruto waved at me from across the road. He looked so happy, always cheerful. _Why can't I be like that? _I looked at him and smiled. He was my support, always so happy to help me out.

"Hey Naruto, what's up?"

I hugged him back. He's so nice to me all the time.

"Do you want to go and eat ramen with me? Its around the corner…"

I looked at him warily. I want to say yes since he is my best friend and I want to spend time with him, but then again, he can be so clueless. I've been avoiding Sasuke for the last two weeks so knowing Naruto he probably invited Sasuke for ramen as well.

I resigned. "Sure, let's go! I still owe you a bowl from that time when I lost the bet."

He beamed. I still can't figure out where does he get all his energy.

"… so I was wondering what you thought about it but, Sakura, give me an honest opinion." Naruto looked at me expectantly. I blinked. I couldn't say I was so lost in my thoughts that I didn't hear anything he said. I nodded, agreeing to what it is most likely the worst idea in the planet. He didn't push any further and dropped the subject. This was going to bite me in the ass. _I am so sure of it._

We walked to Ichiraku's at a slow pace while talking about training strategies. He sat down at the bar and I was crossing my fingers hoping Sasuke wouldn't show up. Minutes passed, food arrived and Sasuke didn't come. I couldn't help but feel a little bit gloomy. I knew I didn't want him to come but then, why was I secretly hoping he was going to show up? I'm being so annoying again. That's what he'll probably say.

"Can I finish your bowl? It seems you're not going to finish it." Naruto asked me so sweet. Why can't I like a guy more like Naruto? Life could be so much easier. With a forced smile I handed my bowl to him.

xxxxx

Naruto's birthday was coming up. As I was walking down the main road in Konoha, I was thinking about what should I get him as a birthday present. He didn't ask for anything so I knew it was going to be a little bit difficult to find something perfect for him. Should I buy him clothes or perhaps something handmade?

I was lost in thought when I bumped into something. It was something hard and firm. I looked up and it was Sasuke's chest. We looked into each other's eyes. We didn't say anything but I wanted to. _So badly_. I didn't realize I missed him desperately until I saw him after a few weeks. His eyes said nothing to me. I couldn't read him. Hopefully Ino was right and he felt the same as me. Who was I kidding? That could never happen.

I looked down to the ground and walk away without saying a word.

xxxxx

Awkward. That was the word that described what I felt. It was very awkward for me during Naruto's party. First of all, for some reason everybody was extremely drunk, either passing out on the couch or making out. Ino was throwing herself at Shikamaru. Naruto couldn't even stand up from his bed and Hinata was by his side helping him. Sasuke was being stupid and watched everybody from the corner of the living room. I was trying to help everybody out. However, the awkwardness award went to Gaara. He went to the party when he knew that I wasn't completely over him yet. I couldn't blame him though, our relationship ended months ago. So, should I speak to him or just let it go? Gaara didn't even blinked in my direction_. Awkward_.

I sighed happily once again when Gaara left along with everybody else. Sasuke, Naruto and me were the only ones left.

"Thank God this is over. Sasuke help me move Naruto to his bed."

We lifted him up and dragged him away from the couch. Naruto kept muttering something that I couldn't understand but apparently Sasuke could. He kept looking at him as if he was mad at something he had said.

"What's wrong? Is he feeling okay? I can't hear what he said"

Sasuke fulminated me with his eyes and I kept my mouth shut. This was no way to end up a party.

"Sakura, sleep on the couch"

He never looked at me. I complied silently but then I realized something was wrong. Apparently one of the two couches on the living room was puked on so it wasn't usable anymore.

"Where are you going to sleep? There's only one couch."

"With you"

My heart started to beat fast. So fast I thought I was going to pass out. We didn't fit on the couch when we slept on opposite sides because he was so tall and buff so we both slept on the same side of the couch. He was hugging me.

_We are sleeping together. We are sleeping together. We are sleeping together._

This chant repeated itself unconsciously for at least five minutes. I couldn't sleep. Not like this.

His mouth started to drop to my neck. I inhaled deeply terrified of my hidden desires. Is this really happening? He grabbed my chin and tilted my head towards him. He kissed me deeply. My mouth started moving and I was in such bliss. Everything was forgotten, the urge to see him, the awkwardness of the night, Gaara and finally, my dignity.

xxxxx

The next day I woke up naked on the coach and Sasuke wasn't there. At least he put a blanket over me. I changed quickly and left Naruto's house. What should I do? Oh my god, I really fucked up this time…


End file.
